I'm going to write a bit out of turn here, as I actually wrote this BEFORE I wrote the Chiang Mai and Phuket post that I just posted. I am sitting on the flight from Bangkok to Rome, having left Phuket at 9pm, and boarded the Rome flight with my family after midnight. I posted my Bangkok blog post, but that still left me behind. A blog is like an 'accounts payable', that you gotta keep up, and 'pay the bills'. That may make this process sound more onerous than it actually is, as writing this stuff has been a pleasure, but getting behind does create something in my head, more guilt than stress. And being behind is actually part of the process, as I'm talking with my wife and kids, thinking about the experiences, and doing a great deal of the 'writing' prior to even putting my hands on the keyboard.
So, although I need to do my thoughts and photos of Chiang Mai and Phuket, I REALLY REALLY need to lay down some thoughts on Asia. Yesterday marked eight weeks on the road for my family and I. It's actually bothering us that we have completed over fifty percent of this trip. There was so much anticipation, so much planning, so much energy, logistics and and not just a little portion of huevos for my family to actually do this trip that the thought that it will be done in seven weeks bugs me a little. More than a little.
Leaving Asia has a lot to do with these feelings. When we were planning the trip as 'round the world', I had lots of spirited (I'll leave it at that) discussions with my wife on how to break out the 107 days between Asia and Europe. We had sheets of paper and an atlas, were starting to get a handle on the rules of a Star Alliance round the world flight (no help at all from AmEx, they were BEYOND useless), and were laying out the trip. We wanted a roughly 50/50 split between Asia and Europe, but the SCALE of Asia is not really understood by many folks in the west. So a split, or Euro bias to the trip timing would not cut it, and there was "concern" (aren't I a good husband to write like this) by my wife that travelling to China, Indonesia, Vietnam, Cambodia, Singapore, and Thailand with three little kids would not be safe, appropriate, healthy and a whole bunch of other adjectives (all politely expressed of course). Kim had been with me to India once, but that was a one week work whirlwind, and she had come to Hong Kong with me on another occasion, but this part of the world was still an enigma. My kids had been to Europe several times, and Central America once, but never west of Hawaii.
And then there was a question of Weather. Originally, we thought of going the Eastward route, but Europe would still have been cold and rainy in April. When we did homework, India, where we wanted to spend more time and show the kids was also out of the question, as the weather for wimpy westerners gets way too hot by mid-late April (as all of our Indian heritage friends in San Diego told us). Thailand and Vietnam are most miserable weather-wise in April as well. So the westward routing we ultimately took started to take shape. I got Kim to agree to an Asia bias to the trip, which was tough as there was a lot of family support for her position (i.e. you are crazy to take your little kids to Asia for two months) from my family, but thankfully her sisters and mother had all travelled extensively in Asia (and one has studied and lived in Cambodia), so I had support there. Good in-laws are a blessing. Several times a day, for months before the trip, my kids and I would have Kim recite her Asian mantra of "I'm hot, I'm miserable, and I'm getting eaten alive". Thankfully for me, there were many times where she was 'two for three' on the mantra scale (i.e. hot and miserable, or miserable and eaten alive by bugs), but Asia the way we scheduled the trip was not as hot as she thought, so my temperature sensitive wife was not as miserable as she thought, and outside of a few places, we did not provide meals for hoards of tourist hungry mosquitoes. And she was never "three for three" for her mantra. Eight weeks. And now it is done.
I was getting a massage at the Mandara Spa at the JW Marriott in Phuket where we were staying, on June 9th, the day before we left Thailand. The massage, a great massage, was 90 minutes long, and was a combination of 'accupressure' and Thai Message. As the massage progressed, I had one arm worked on, then another, then a leg. Each portion was wonderful in its own way, and I went through a mental process of both enjoying the moment, anticipating the next part of the massage. The massage itself took 90 minutes out of my last full day in Phuket, which was a commitment in itself, meaning that I missed the baby elephants doing their daily 4pm saunter on the beach, and I missed pool time (tough life). A short massage would not have been as relaxing, and a longer message would have been too much of a time commitment. Believe it or not, all of this is going through my head, even as I keep on drifting off into 'massage sleep land', and it hits me that the t massage is a perfect metaphor for this trip. Anticipating each portion, enjoying it while we were in each part, and a combination of sadness and anticipation as we moved on to the next spot. And with this flight to Rome, more than a little bit of regret that a wonderful unique time in my life, my wife's life, and my three kid's lives, was past . Or somewhat with a touch of maudlin, but also I think with a touch of reality about how the world works, maybe even a little bit of metaphor for life. Enjoying the moment, anticipating the future, and regretting that a wonderful time has past, and the reality that future family experiences will be wonderful in their own way, but the will never be THIS experience.
And my kids, aged 4, 10, and 11 have endured 15+ plane flights, 19 hotel changes, every mode of transportation known to mankind for the last several thousand years (including ox-carts, elephants, and long distance rowboats) have both soaked it all in, and taken it all in stride. They have seen things they never knew existed, eaten things they never knew could be eaten, and viscerally smelled, touched, absorbed environments totally alien to their daily lives in San Diego. They saw just how different suburban California life is from the "real world", they witnessed thousands of times in many countries that material possessions is not the only way for people to be able to laugh, to be happy, to have a 'good life'. They saw people whose lives were tied inextricably to the land around them, in ways that have not appreciably changed for hundreds of years. They saw the transitory nature of human's perception of power and control, and sometimes nations, and not only saw the scars of war and of nature, but spoke to people who have lived through things that thankfully most of us have never had to experience.
So, gotta do some Asia "Best Of" and "Worst of":
- Shanghai: Great people, great energy, tremendous dynamism
- Guilin: Boggling Li River Cruise. Great cheap food. Our family's first 'five seats in a row' foot massage in the 300 person foot massage parlor! The Guilin countryside, and the 'old lady' we will never forget
- Xian: Terra Cotta Warriors, and the walled inner city that we did not have enough time to explore (you can rent a mountain bike and bike 15km+ of 16th century wall)
- Bali: Bali need more time than ten days. The people, the sights, the sounds. All of us can still hear the bells and smell the incense of the New Year's festival that we attended.
- Vietnam: A must go back. Hanoi and the north needs a lot more exploration, and one of my daughters talks almost daily about Halong Bay, which is a "must see" for any life. The people, who have endured so much and have such a great attitude for life. We are not done with Vietnam!
- Cambodia: I was sick, it was raining, and it was obvious that at least Angkor was an unhappy place. But the temples were boggling, and the temples in the rain (and sick) added a nuance to the whole experience. The kids climbing up 70 degree inclines with me to the top of temples, and spending two days doing all sorts of death defying temples visits. Meets the Hype and more
- Singapore: Perfect respite after five weeks, like being home, but cleaner, safer, more affluent, and with more Asian folks!
- Bangkok: The Grand Temple, Long Tail Boats through the canals
- Chaing Mai and Phuket: I'm gonna skip highs and lows here, as I still need to write them up:
- Safety: Eight weeks with Kids and not a SINGLE time where Kim or my alarm bells went off for personal safety reasons. Walking with family in day, walking with family at night, with our without guides, nothing. We felt a few times (maybe it was the signs in multiple languages) that there were pickpockets about, and their probably were, but family safety, or personal safety. A non-issue.
- Prepaid phone cards: Awesome, and the grandparents back home like them as well.
- The food, in China before we overloaded on Chinese food, and the foods everywhere else. Nothing like fresh veggies (COOKED!), fish, meats, curries, satays, yum! Green Tea House in Beijing, Dinners at the Legian Bali, small local Mongolian Restaurant in Xian, my wife and my anniversary dinner in Sayan, Bali, the Thai Restaurant at the JW Marriott Phuket, Spices at the Metropole Hanoi (my daughters buffalo cooked seven ways), Satays in the street market in Singapore, even our first stop in McDonalds six plus weeks into the trip while in Bangkok.
- The Hindu Temples in Bali and the Buddhist temples all over Thailand, and even a few amazing ones in Vietnam. I've written about and put photos in the blog, but the writing and photo's can't quite capture the 'five senses' dimensionality of some of the visits.
- The drivers everywhere: They had the most interesting experiences to relate, as most were older than the guides. Their skills, driving in environments where I don't know how they did not kill anybody or all of us. Boggling skill!
There were low points too, but not many:
- China: Any history has been stripped and/or destroyed in the last 50 years. The historical sites are too often a 'disneyesque' redo of prior splendor. The scale is boggling, but there is an emptiness that one senses. Food, I love Chinese food, but two weeks of ANY culture's cuisine, three meals a day, gets monotonous. The "party" line guides we had are just a joke in this day an age, in some instances a USB stick with a big WAV file would have been as informative. And guides talking obnoxiously loud in temples just to make the point to the people praying that they are "party" and religion is still frowned upon is really weak. Five straight Blue Buick Minivans, and five straight guides denying that there was any coincidence to that. The Security Head of the Kerry Center, who was completely wacked out (DO NOT STAY AT THE KERRY CENTER!). The Tour manager in Guilin, who met me in the lobby to tell me that the "party" reserved rooms in the hotel, and that my family might need to move out on short notice (a lie, as I talked to the Sheraton hotel manager, and they DID have high occupancy, but it was the Tour company that never made a reservation)
- Bali: One bad experience which led to a hotel swap, but the hotel we went to was one of the best we had ever stayed at, so not problem there. The main 'bad' in Bali is the tragedy of the suffering that the Balinese have gone through since the bombing
- Vietnam: Eating the spring roll that I should not have, and getting bitten by something that have me a week of night fevers, head and body aches (perhaps a touch of dengue!)
- Kim's bathtub wipe out in Chiang Mai and resulting hospital visit and five stitches in her chin (although the Thai hospital experience was truly professional, thorough, and fast)
- Cambodia: Above, Singapore: None, Chaing Mai and Phuket, can't skip the process
- A couple of taxi drivers that tried to take advantage of us, but this was two or three times out of many dozens of various modes of transportation (which I will list separately)
- The street bargaining process. Getting quoted 50 USD initially for four t-shirts that I later bought higher quality from a different vendor a day later for $12 without bargaining, gets a bit old
- The Water thing in the hotels. Terrible!
- Oreo's: Ubiquitous in every country, and after a while we began to joke that there were rice based societies, bread based societies, and that the Belk family has Oreos as a staple of our diet. My older daughter says it will be at least a year before she can eat another Oreo.
- And of course, an honorable 'remention' of my oldest daughter blowing chunks on the Customs kiosk on our first day arrival in Shanghai!
Also worth a note is the vast array of transportation alternatives that we have made use of in the last eight weeks:
Airlines:
- United
- China Southern
- China Eastern
- Singapore (5 legs)---Nothing like Singapore Airlines!
- Air Vietnam (Two Legs)---Great little airline
- Thai Airways (5 legs)---Adequate, clean, good staff, food worse than United, and that is a challenge!
Vans: Too numerous to count
Taxi's: Too mumerous to count
Ox-Cart---(with ancient Oxen and an even more ancient cart)
Elephants (many)
On top of elephant in River (whole family), on top of elephant in Ocean (one daughter)
Black and White Water Buffalo (kids only in Chiang Mai)
Long Tail Boat (urban): Three, rural, several (Mekong)
River Boat: Many in Vietnam
Row Boat with Eleven People in Boat and One guy standing and rowing (one, Halong Bay).
Large Junk: Great trip, Ginger Junk, Halong Bay
Bamboo Raft (in Jungle North of Chiang Mai down a river)
Speedboat: Criscraft with 3 X 200 HP Engines out to the Phi Phi and Khai Islands off Phuket---the sound stays in your bones.
Three Wheel Tuk Tuk / Cycle: Several
Bicycle Rickshaws---Several in China and Vietnam through the old parts of the city
Pick-up Truck "Red" Local Taxi: Several
London Taxi belonging to Hotel: Two (to Hospital in Chiang Mai and Back)
Me, for my youngest daughter, as when she would get tired she would say "Hey, rickshaw elevator" which was my indication that I needed to be her rickshaw and/or elevator
Walking, everywhere, with zero complaints (on the other hand lots of enthusiasm from the kids)
You are a good writer Mr. Belk! Thanks to you, my husband is terrified I am planning such a trip for our family. -Amy
Posted by: Amy Waterman | June 25, 2007 at 11:00 AM